breakfast? really?

i know that at least 1 of our 5 readers is a huge chick-fil-a fan. we don't really have it up north, so i can't say that i have an affinity. but, this morning at my meeting they had ordered 'chick-n-minis', which made me wonder - when did it become acceptable to eat chicken nuggets at 8:30 in the morning? that said, they were delish. 

speaking of answering machines...

this was one of my favorite as-seen-on-TV commercials in the 80s. sweet pleats may have covered this already, but i always loved Crazy Calls. especially The Rap message:

wait for the beep

you gotta leave your name

you gotta leave your number

hmm...i'm actually contemplating recording this for my outgoing message...

hello. is it me you're looking for?

actually, no. 

i have a woman who keeps calling me and leaving me messages on my answering machine for some one i'll call 'jane'.  

(yes, i'm that old school that not only do i have a 13" college TV still, i also have a landline, non-cordless phone & an answering machine. but, to be fair, it's a digital answering machine and not a mini-cassette tape one.)

her latest message entailed a pond being flooded, taking about a year to repair and oh, by the way i don't think that it's fair that i'm keeping all of your art books, so please come pick them up. 

bizarro. 

this little gnome...

...is a bit sleepy at the moment, but will hopefully be blogging again about all things bizarro shortly. 

cheers, bye!

bizarro gnome is off to swinging london for the long weekend. and pandora & van ramblings are off to some south pacific island. 

we wish you a very happy holiday weekend! 

got robohawk?

hate pigeons? for a mere $4,200 you can have your very own robohawk to chase the nuisances away. i'm surprised this isn't sold in skymall yet. 

sergeant sasquatch

i didn't think that i would need the yeti label again, but here is a yeti hanging out in nyc with the nypd. 

oh, slutbucks

apparently, i'm not the only one who doesn't like the new off-equity starbucks logos. 

a group is protesting the new/old logo (above) pointing out that it's 'a naked woman on it with her legs spread like a prostitute'. they are calling for not only a boycott, but for a re-branding of it as 'slutbucks'. 

maybe, but i still love my slutty grande vanilla skim latte...

table topic #3

glad that peeps are enjoying the table topics. here's another:

3. What's your favorite ride at an amusement park?

I hate those free-fall rides, but I can't get enough of roller coasters! I love old school wooden ones - this year my goal is to cross the Coney Island Cyclone of the list. But, I also love the loop-de-loops ones - in fact, the more loops the better!

hey, sailor

i honor of fleet week in nyc, here's one of my favorite tees.

would you like a straw with that heart attack?

yahoo did a feature of the worst drinks in america and this whopper took the tops as the unhealthiest. 

while i'm sure it tastes delicious, the baskin robbins large heath bar shake is a massive 2,310 calories & 108 grams of fat! not surprisingly, it's being discontinued at the end of the month. 

my new obsession

...are these customized starbuckscards. that said, i'm too cheap to pay an extra $4.00 to actually get one. 

fun or terrifying?

i don't have any pets, but i think this blue/stuffed/nautical sort of octopus would terrify them. 

this is sort of like the octodog as chew toy. 

oh crap

new business trip, new issue of skymall for me last week. i actually think this is a fun gift - it's a breakout towable tube for behind a boat. i just love this illustrative picture. i don't know which is better - the poor kid's grip-of-death on the tube or the i'm-going-to-crap-my-pants look on his face? 

i could also label this as i'm old, as i think this kid is way to young to be riding on this thing!

yes, facebook i am ready to retire

wow, for a change from facebook - no babies, no lonely hearts, no muffin top. 

now this is an ad i can get behind.  

table topic #2

thanks for sharing your favorite comfort foods in TFAAF's first table topic yesterday. not sure if we will include a table topic every time we post, but here's another fun one:

2. If you could spend a Saturday morning watching any cartoon what would it be?

As an adult, I would have to say that technically my favorite cartoon is Family Guy. But, if we are talking about the Saturday morning variety cartoon it would have to by far and hands down be Scooby Doo. Particularly one of the episodes that featured a celebrity guest: Don Knots, Phillis Diller and my favorite episode - the Mama Cass in the (haunted) candy factory. 

 

Just as a quick aside, apparently Shaggy's real name was Norville Rogers - zoinks!  

And yours...?

admirable, but coco loco (sidewalk edition)

now, i haven't studied geometry for about 18 years now, but the last time i checked the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. so...who approved this jazzy sidewalk?! clearly a city where no one actually walks. i guess admirable that they wanted a new design, but in terms of functionality? coco loco. 

table topic #1

my sister gave me a box of 'table topics' ice breakers as a housewarming gift. while they didn't make it out during my last game night, thought it be interesting to post & answer a few on the blog and ask our 3-5 readers to do the same in the comments. so, with out further ado...

1. What is your favorite comfort food?

I think it would have to be macaroni & cheese. Mom's homemade, jazzy restaurant style, out of the cardboard box...doesn't matter which - all are yum! 

and yours?

why i feel old, part 8

today a the bookstore i overheard the sales clerk talking to her boss. he made a reference to bruce springsteen's jungleland. she looked perplexed and then explained that her musical tastes don't go that far back. but, her brother 'is from gen X' and he did introduce her to bands like 'nirvana'. 

oh well/whatever/nevermind, indeed. 

anyone for brinner?

apparently jack-in-the-box's latest promotion is to push a 4th meal - between dinner & breakfast. 

at that hour your body doesn't need brinner or dinfast - it needs sleep. 

and we wonder why americans are so fat...

 

you can take the gnome out of london...

today i went into a shop and the saleswoman chatted me up a bit. she asked me where i was from. when i replied, 'from the neighborhood,' she said, 'oh, i thought you were from england. you sound like you are british'. 

so i guess should come out of denial that i do have a madonna accent?

 

you know you're in a college town when...

...it's perfectly acceptable that the pizza joint (no pun intended) is called 'mellow mushroom'.

touché

recently, bizarro gnome received an offline comment from a TFAAF reader on a previous post. it was in reference to a nerd conversation she overheard on the subway. the commenter argued that this was not, in fact, a nerd conversation but just an average guy conversation. 

she was planning a response post to the comment arguing that while elements of the convo could be any guy (e.g., star wars, maybe a video game here & there), she would have expected talk of beer, fantasy baseball, babes who are hot, etc. and not things like 'beta versions that are awesome'. 

in the meantime, however, said commenter shared this above video, which he felt was 'two fish worthy' and clearly in defense of his comment. 

touché, dear reader, touché.

 

more smelly experiences

ah, the glamours of business travel. 

yesterday, on my tiny plane back home, i had the joys of experience a delightful scent mix of body odor, drakkar noir & airplane toilet (i.e., poop). 

flossy, flossy. 

Admirable but Coco Loco

So we are sitting in this cool organic/'I kill nothing' cafe in Christchurch, NZ. The cafe is the inspiration of this Indian guru who as far as I can see has developed a well-meaning cult. Anyhow the place is decked out with all the paraphernalia - thought provoking sayings, blessed candles, water fountains...you get the picture.

Above our table was this video playing additional material about what the guru gets up to. He does things like play free music concerts for people (playing over 100 instruments in one concert alone). He does charity work and gives inspirational talks. Oh and he also goes around the world bench pressing things....like Soul Diva Roberta Flack, the heaviest cow in the world, and a team of sumo wrestlers.

Other people of note that he has also lifted are Nelson Mandela, Desmond Tutu, Muhammad Ali, Jesse Jackson, Eddie Murphy, Susan Sarandon, Yoko Ono, and of course Sting and Richard

Yeah I would say that he qualifies for Admirable but totally coco loco.

taking a little break

bizarro gnome hates it when this whole working thing gets in the way of her blogging. 

unfortch, she's on a bit of a break at the moment, but stay tuned for more bizarro-ness shortly. 

april showers bring may flowers

happy may day! nothing like cherry blossoms in full bloom to make you smile on a cloudy day.