what's up doc?

we only had two appointments together, but i am going to miss my ophthalmologist. firstly, he will be played by steve martin as vinnie antonelli (thanks to imdb) in my blue heaven - only with a posh british accent. secondly, on top of my diagnosis i got a few excellent crackers:

• so, how long have you been in the UK? [three years.] three years?! you get less for murder.
• where are you from? [new york.] ah, new york...my girlfriend's sister lives in 'jersey' - you gotta fly into newark, am i right? honestly, who flies into jfk - it's a nightmare. am i right?
• [reads my vision] 6/4 (meters)...well, hey, that's about as good as life gets.